In the days of unhappy
Attempt to be happy
For there is nothing
To be faking

I'm not forsaking
Just wanna be making
Be happy
Just for me!

ANGRY!!!!!!

Today, I've heard of something really ridiculous. I mean, I can't say it is but I feel that it is. Maybe I'm acting too over. You know, I've been really wanting people to grow old with me, in a sense that our mentality grow up together.

Few days ago, I've invited Ireetha for a youth gathering and asked so that the parents would send her and her brother. I've never thought of just to meet him or to affect him but I was just thinking of his psychological growth. The talk is regarding something all would go through and I hope that he would be able to listen to it at first hand. I hope that them can understand that we need to grow both materially and spiritually.

I know I'm angry for such a reason is kinda ridiculous but I just hope that they would not limit him in his learning. I read the book "Rich Kid Poor Kid" and it's stated there that parents are the one that'll cause their children to be limited because they don't improve themselves accordingly. If they really want their children to grow, they have to let them take the risk! Will you ever learn to get up when you've never learned to fall?

I love people for who they are and I will only tend to make them more happy not failure. If they really want the best for him, they would know when to let him go. I hope they let him go and love the children equally.

Love is the only thing on earth that is limitless and when we do something, we tend to limit it! Come on people, wake up! Just love truthfully because it's from the heart which is sincere...

Why I never realized I was a crap?
Until the time have past
I became a mummy crap
while it was meant to be the last

Was love meant to be a curse for me
Or i was just an enchanted queen
ready to be lonely me
just like the breezes flee

Don't wanna know why
I just can't see why
Tell me the reason why
Am I meant to be white?

It felt slashed and felt smashed
As though there were nothing but breath
I don't believe it
It'll never be through
As I love you
And I know you too

Relationships?

I never knew that I would heart broken because of relationships now... However, I never want to give up although I say I tend to. I finally realized that I've hurt many people...

Yesterday, I received a message from someone that used to be after me. He said that I caused him to be who he is today and I feel really bad as he said he didn't bear the chance to continue his studies abroad was because of me. I'm really scared of him but I felt guilty when he say so. However, I never regret rejecting him because I never had any feelings for him thus I was afraid of him. I love him as a friend and will never be more than that, I just hope I could help him now...

Frankly, before I received the message, I've thought of giving up SURAZ. However, I didn't. After reading the message, it made me realized, if you truly love someone, it doesn't mean that you should have him in your life forever, letting him go would be the better.

Love and unity is the most important factor in everything. I hope that my love for him would be as much as my love for God thus would add on as I serve.

"Where there is love, nothing is too much trouble and there is always time."

Heart Broken...

Well... First time in my life, I know the pain of heart break. Why? You know why...

Ok ok... not my personal things... Just that I have to learn to be broken to be in a piece again...

Thank you all you guys who helped me in my time of tests... Especially baby(if you read this post and made me laughed alot then it's you =P)..

I'm like a Cinderella because I have to go home before 12am but someone say I'm an enchanted princess because can't have relationships that lasted more than 2 months. Now, I won't have anymore relationships because it's a waste of time if relationship can't last forever, love is just an illusion if there is no true commitment and sacrifice; it will just be a glass waiting to be break at dawn; I seek for a diamond commitment and selfless sacrifice.

In other words, I seek for people who can serve God with me not people who can accompany me or promise me things that can't be done. Please don't come and hurt me anymore, I'm not as tough as I'm seen.

The Greatest Day..

I went to Muar for teaching today.. We successfully enrolled 4 junior youths, 3 children and 2 adults to 4 core activities... I'm so happy...

The happiest thing I've been through is that I could finally see the person I love. Although we were avoiding each other, didn't talk and to me, seems like enemies, I'm contented. I finally understand that when you love someone, you should let that person go... I must thank Sayshan because he taught me what was right and wrong thus let me go... However, I could barely deny that I love SURAZ more than anything...

I'm really afraid that it would be my karma because I've dumped lots of guys before... I was a very playful, jolly and naughty girl; now, I just tend to do everything so that our relationship remains including serving for blessings.

Somehow, I understand that we should, as a Bahai, let teaching become the dominating passion in our lives. I agree that and I hope that I can be so. I just hope for world unity and that's it.

I'll not let my personal desire outtake my love for God. I just want to be like Abdul Baha, be as a candle to burn the flame in people's lives.

Just smile, laugh and be happy for me ok? God is the most Merciful... =)

Should I still hope for everlasting love in the path of service? I still hope that it's the same person from now till forever, love is dramatic...