21/12/08

Dear, now I feel really guilty...

Now is 2.31am and I AM STILL AWAKE!!! I know I should be sleeping now because I should be awake in 3 and a half hour but frankly, not a time I can manage to sleep if it's a day before STS. To me, it's like my wedding day.. HAHA ^^

Dear, another thing I feel really guilty is that some times (okay, it was most of the time, now no more, promised! no more!!!), I feel like leaving you because you seems to not care about me but today when you wake me up. I could really feel your gentleness, love and care. (That's why I'm pleading for no guilt from you!!! Sorry ah...)

Dear, today, you're so cute... I know I tend to be very tough at times to you but it is definitely guaranteed that it's because I want to spend more time with you... (Including the supper oh... I can't eat anymore but I just want to spend some time with you... Miss you very much because you always busy since Chinese New Year is near...)

Dear, I love you... I really don't know what to say...

Tell you one thing for sure, I don't think I will go overseas to study alone because tonight I can't sleep is due to being scared, left alone at home... you ask me not to think so much but when I want to sleep, a lot of sound appear.... HELP!!!!

How can I live[leave?] without you? I want to know.

Will you marry me after I complete our covenant? Afford my own things... Promise?

=?Enchanted?=

No excuse to be successful.

In our life, we often run into similar situation.

When we ponder into things that we don’t want to do, we often tell ourselves "No time".

When we saw and heard about other people successful stories, relate back about our lack of achievement, we will always find reason to console ourselves "they are just lucky, I am not".

If we want to do something bad enough, we will do it, and do it very well too.

You can either control your mind or let your mind control you.

Things that you love, you always have the time for it.

Every successful person knows exactly what he desired, they know where to search for it, find no excuses, wholeheartedly focus on pursuing it "NO excuses for yourself", for they know whatever they focus is where they go.

A simple sentence, yet is the key to the path of success.

If you are lousy at something, find your weakness, work hard to change it and never look for excuses.

pick from one's blog:
=?Enchanted?=

17/12/2008

Today, I watch the drama "moonlight resonance". It's really a touching drama and also irritating. Many might think that it's just a drama but I can tell you with absolute sincerity, this happen in a real life, to my own family. (grandma's family, actually.)

Other than that, the special thing today is that I woke up at 10am and was receiving phone calls. Today, I wanted to talk to dear but he never picks up my call, only reply my sms... *sob sob*

At night, I closed the booth at 10pm then watched a movie entitled "Volcano", which I watched when I was 9, or even younger. I remember it so well because I was so sleepy when I was watching that movie but in order to watch everything, I forced myself to open my eyes. I even set the timer so that the tv will automatically shut down by itself when the movie is over.. Haha..

After the movie ended, it was 11.30pm, I pulled my 20kg bag, carry my 2litre Herbalife bottle with a box hugged and walk back home, rested for 10 minutes then walk out to get the table and chair. I was really scared so I tried to call my dear but he didn't answer the phone then I called another friend, he didn't answer so I called one and my distributor and we talk. When I was back at the shop again, it's already 12am. We talked on the phone until 12.30am then I left with the help of 2 boys carrying my table and chairs. No doubt that I am really tired.

I swear, this type of life without a car would not be long. Now I understand, having a boyfriend is nothing to do with having a better life or a different life because it doesn't make a difference at all when you feel that you're like his sister, when you're not kissing.

What does it mean?

=?Enchanted?=

Dear...

Dear, do you know how I'm feeling right now? I feel really terrible.

It's either I sucks as a girlfriend or we both just don't match.

Are we at the progressing level or decreasing level? It feels like we're always too busy to spend time together lately.

However, I understand that you need to earn an income. I just hope what I'm doing is correct.

I feel like breaking up as it feels better not needing to worry about us. The reason is not because I don't love you anymore but because I'm feeling really lonely and insecure at times. It makes me feel really useless.

I'm still very afraid to be in your family because I'm not familiar with them and unfortunately, till now, I was never reassured by you, how I did doing our first meeting. Secondly, lately, you scold me more than you care, it really make me doubt if I should prolong this relationship.

Dear, is it that our time have come to an end? It's like it's so hard for me to talk to you. You never seem to have time for me to talk. How can I even try to talk to you when you don't give me a chance?

I never open the booth for few days because I feel like I've lost myself. It's like I'm turning into someone materialistic and that is the last thing in the world I want to be related to. I don't know what should I do instead of writing here.

I hope you'll have time to read this..

=?Enchanted?=

When it feels like breaking...

When couples wait too long to ask for help, the relationship may be beyond repair. The sooner help is sought, the better chance there is of recovering, saving and actually strengthening the relationship. This includes issues dealing with affairs or other types of betrayal.

The longer we wait, the more entrenched we get in destructive patterns and resentment and all hope for change is lost.

The longer we wait, the more entrenched we get in destructive patterns and resentment and all hope for change is lost. At a certain point we don't even want change... we just want to be done.

The seven warning signs that a relationship is in trouble are:

1. Fighting has become the rule rather than the exception to the rule.

2. You find yourself looking outside the relationship for comfort, care, and understanding.

3. You can't remember what attracted you to your partner in the first place.

4. There is little or no intimacy in your relationship -- sleeping in different rooms or different beds, lack of interest, anger, and hostility so that intimacy is out of the question.

5. Spending very little time together, friends seem to be more important than your partner.

6. Reactions to situations are disproportionate to the content of the disagreement (i.e., feeling your partner doesn't love you because she/he didn't like the meal you cooked).

7. Feeling helpless and hopeless to change anything. Feeling done with the relationship, but unclear as to where to go and what to do. Feelings of anger, resentment, pain, and desperation are predominant.

If any or all of these describe you in your relationship, your relationship is in trouble and it won't be long before something more drastic happens, such as an affair, arguments get worse and inflate with intensity, increased jealousy, silence for longer periods of time, and sometimes even physical and/or verbal abuse.


Seriously, that's all the above I'm feeling above... Is it a good sign to be able to know it, or not?

=?Enchanted?=

Lately

I've been really lost lately, thinking how of to fix things.

Do you know how it feels to be having a rich friend and always worry about being seen as a materialistic girl? I do.

I really don't know how to live a normal life now. I want to help everyone in my life to achieve a better life (both $$ & health, including losing and gaining weight!!) but I don't know why it just seems so hard to fulfill because everyone just think that you would want to cheat their money and make them buy something.

What should I do to let them understand that I really want to help someone?

Please please... Can anyone give me an answer?

Continued..

I've found someone I could depend on, I guess. At least I really do.

Although we don't have much in common but it's first time in my life, I think of crap. It's not that I'm saying he's not good. Just that he let me see the true me. Unlike other guys, they just say, "you sucks, break up!" Then the next thing I knew, we broke up and I was dumped.

The worst thing about a relationship is not about being dumped but it's about the progress in the relationship. To me, the relationship I always wanted was the type of relationship that was natural. I 'm really grateful that God had sent him to me. Never I thought that he would come in that way.

He came the way I pleaded for him to come. Just as patient as I wished. I know my cruel, stupid and idiotic moves drives him crazy but I just enjoy seeing him crazy over me, at the same time still love me. I know he won't leave me because he loves me as much.

Many times in life, I wonder if I can really stick to someone like how I stick to him but he's rather different. Even though he is one of his kind, he can just get my heart easily. A single laugh or cry would just go through my heart. I enjoy seeing his smiles because they are the wonders of the world.

Sometimes, the naughty me would try everything just to see him let go his temper but I just want to get a chance to make you feel relieved when I call you "Hubbie". You do know right, how much I love you?

Sometimes, even though I write something that hurts you the most in the world by questioning you but it would never hurt you more than it hurts me because I know that I'm hurting you badly. I just want to let you know that no matter how thing hurts, we have to face it and you've got me to face it with you. ^^

Sometimes, I make you wait. I love knowing you'll wait, like you're always mine and only mine. I see those eyes my neighbours have on you, those envious eyes because they know I've got you, the best person in the world for me.

Sometimes, I refuse to bathe even when I know that we're rushing for time and it's a very important appointment. You'll get even nervous than me. The reason I'm doing this is to be able to see the nervous and caring face God had prepared for me...

Sometimes, I maybe talking too much even if it's the middle of the night but I just don't want to hang up so that I can spend more time with you even though I thoroughly understand that it's bad for our healths and our career. You just make me can't stand the separation, you know?

Sometimes, when you refuse to talk to me because I refused to talk to you first. It really hurts but I tell myself that I can't cry because you'll be blaming yourself and feeling really sad. I understand my moodiness but what can I do when I face you? You're just different.

When I lay in your arm, I know you'll protect me.

When I hold your hand, I know you won't let me go.

When I see your eyes, I see only me.

When I make fun of you, I see your contented, fooled smile which is rather cute.

When I pay for you, I know you're sad because you wanted to be the gentleman but poor you, as I want to be a lady too.

When I cry in your arms, I know it's you that will comfort me even though it's very funny when I wonder what you were trying to do.

When we have a big fight, though it's not even more than 1 minute, I can't stand it because you'll cry like a baby. I love it the most when it ends, you'll hug me so tightly like you're afraid I'll speed like a road runner.

You are really cute when you send those messages thinking that I would be really sad and blaming myself because my family left for a trip without me. You are really caring as you are and I thank God for giving me you. I love you. ^^

Dear, I really hope you ACCIDENTALLY read it...

=?Enchanted?=

In HFL means no friends out of HFL?

Today, I was asked if I was lying that my friend gone back to Penang. Yes he is back at his home. The funniest thing is that, when I was asked, I was on the phone with him. It's a crazy, sarcastic fact but what can I do with it? It's the fact.

Someone asked me, "did you realize that you have only Herbalife friends?"
I said, "NO!" It's because it's not true. I have lots of friends who're not in HErbalife.

"Do you talk to all of your friends about HErbalife?"
"Well YES! When they ask." after all, being a Herbalife distributor is just about getting yourself sharing about one of the best thing on earth with your loved ones. Just that it's a job and I get paid for it. PAid for talking, not bad. After all, I love talking. ^^

Does all my friends have to be in HErbalife to be my friends? No. I just want to share it with them. Of course I hope they are in Herbalife but if they don't want to, I can do nothing.

We're decision makers not dogs.
We don't obey to orders but listen to our hearts.
WE're teacheable and enthusiatic learners, not just a crap leader.
We're just doing what we know could contribute to help making the world a better place.

Hold on. That's the point. Making the world a better place, isn't it what BAHAIs are promoting. Does it mean that all Bahais need to be doing HErbalife? Not neccessarily but we may.

Being a Bahai, it doesn't mean that we're simply the best. We still need to be teacheable and willing to learn. Being a Bahai is simple and Herbalife is just my job.

I don't know why people like to take Herbalife so personally and didn't disclose the reason of being simply what they DECLARED to be LOGICAL?!

To be logic here, it's just a job like I'm in KFC. Don't get it?

Email: suling239@yahoo.com
Tel(Mobile-Malaysia):+60146366145

=?Enchanted?=

Unity & Me

I'm a Bahai, am I? I don't understand what do I need to do. 2 months as a resource person, I learned more about being a Bahai and doing what we should. It's about being and doing, right?

What does it take to be a Bahai? First, you agree that Baha'u'llah is the Manifestation of Today; Second, you live according to the Bahai teachings, live up to the virtues and spirituality.

Everyone has their own lives. Do you agree?

I have to live my life. I wanna further my studies but I can't as I don't have money and I want to study. Do I have another choice?

Sometimes, I'm just so push down. I don't know what can I do and what should I do. Questions to pull myself down again? No, it is to bring me up.

Sometimes, writing things I feel in the blog, would cause people result in thinking this and that, talking that and this. No one seems to understand me. I just feel like hiding anywhere but stay here.

I may seems to be egocentric as you said but I am who I am. I don't need a lecture, for God's sake. I need no problems but a solution. If you're not going to give me a solution, stay out of my way. My problems are enough.

I may seems not to be teaching in the path but I feel that I am. My thoughts may somehow be affected by people's. However, if it's good, it's ok, right?

I was scolded for trying to drag someone into the Herbalife business which he IS already in. One thing I wanna make it clear, I'm and I will do only what I am supposed to be doing. Get it?

We always talk about entry by troops but what can we do if we don't move it? How do you move it?

What's so good about Herbalife? When you win a heart, will it still be the same? I don't get it!

Look here, I've got my life and my thoughts. I may seems to be egocentric, hot-headed or whatever you say but I know what I want to do.

Please investigate before you open that damn stupid mouth.

Regarding Bahai Faith, go to www.bahai.org
Regarding my work in Herbalife, go to www.herbalife.com
Regarding me, email to suling239@yahoo.com
Regarding contacting me, call 0146366145.

=?Enchanted?=